I never knew perfection till I heard you speak and now it kills me just to hear you say the simple things.

When will I stop blogging non-sense stuffs about him? UGH! I hate this...

Ironic

That fucking moment when you thought twas his bestfriend who is behind in his every status and tweets, but it's NOT. It was another lucky girl. And I know her. A friend of friend. Cool, huh? -.- And I hate her. I hate her for being loved by him. Period. 

I bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about. And she's got everything that I have to live without. 

Friends, lovers or nothing, there can only be one. Friends, lovers or nothing, we'll never be the in between, so give it up.

RED \M/

JSYK

Years from now, I can see you playing on the PBA like what you've been dreaming of. I can even see you play on the Philippine team. I can see you very busy on your training, games, commercials and endorsements because you're going to be the best player above all. I can see how you stand out among the others. I can see you having dinner and celebrating your birthday with your fans just like what the other players do because your fans love you. I can see you having injuries and I can see your frustrations every time you lose games. I can see how you answer when the commentators interview you for being the best player of the game. I can see how the people cheer and shout every time you hold and shoot the ball. I can see how happy you are when you win the game. I can see how you get mad to our opponents and how aggressive you are just to win. I can see how you ignore and deal to your haters whenever they bash or trash-talk you. I can see how fast you gain your followers on twitter and how you try your best to reply to them. I can see banners, twitter accounts, fan pages of your fans club. I can see you buying a new car and house for your family. I can see them, especially your mom and dad happy as you are. Years from now, you already reached your dreams. I can see how happy and contented you are. I can see the both of you happy with your "little you" and "little her" running towards you after the game and how you carry and kiss them and how thankful you are because you have them and you couldn't ask for more aside from winning. Years from now, you're there, playing. And me? At home, watching you play on tv, cheering, shouting, affected and worrying like I am HER. I'm at home with bullshits inside me and wishing that I was the one who's there on the patron box and not her. That I was the one you will greet in national tv every time you win a game. That I was the reason that you're thankful for. That I was the one with you through your achievements and tough times. If I was HER, I would surely be the happiest person alive next to you! But I am not and probably not going to be. And the feeling sucks.. bigtime. I can see you happy years from now, but not with me. But I'd still be happy and proud of you. And your No.1 fan. Always. I promise. xx

I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU... AND ALL YOUR LITTLE THINGS. ♥

This. Now. Please.

Craving for Happy Lemon's Cocoa with rock salt & cheese. Huhu. My new addiction. Can someone bring me this now? I'll love you forever. Swear! Haha. :( 

Girlfriends♥

His sister's beautiful, he got his father's eyes. If you ask me if I love him, I'd lie. First thought when I wake up is, "My God he's beautiful", so I put on my make up and pray for a miracle.

Emmerie's 18th

21 October 2012, Sunday, Ramada Manila Central, Binondo Manila.

With complete POKERS && Xtelle. ♥

Pretending that it's a stolen picture. HAHAHAHA! So funny. 

With the Birthday Celebrant (The one who wears Pink. Obviously) and with our High school teacher, Sir. Red  Rodil. :)

Oh, well. 2nd from the 18 Supporting Actresses (Just like 18 candles on a normal debut) I gave my very well said speech. Psh. I'm so shy that time. Cause you know... -__-

TEAM LACE! Haha. My face, wtf!?

How I look that night. My legs are so fat. Ugh! T.T

With my Babe! Jorelle. ♥ Chef Boy Logro. Nyahahahaha!

With Reinnah. ♥ My twin that night. Find out why. Hahah!

With Dale. :-)

With Yrra! ♥ The gorgeous one. :") 

Taken at Starbucks, Binondo. Coffee bond with Xtelle && Kimmy while waiting for them. Hihi.

The smile after seeing my beloved high school friends after 2 years. Almost 3. Don't mind them at the back. HAHA!


All in all, 'twas a fun night with friends and batchmates. We finally saw each other after graduation. Haha. Very long time. Although the party started so late, it was worth the wait. I guess? Hehe.

Chances....

It's been a week since I posted my last blog post. And it's been a week since we have a misunderstandings. 

Well, happy to say, the gap between us already ended. Kinain ko na lahat ng pride na pwede kong kainin para lang magkabati na kami. I think 5664326 times bago ko gawin kung ano sa tingin ko ang dapat. Inisip ko kung may magababgo ba or wala kung sakaling mag-sorry ako.  Because honestly, mas malaki ang kasalanan nila sakin kumpara sa kasalanan ko sakanila. Pero dahil I don't want to waste a year of our friendship, magpapakumbaba nalang ako. Kakalimutan ko lahat ng mga sinabi nila about me. Kakalimutan ko ang galit. Kakalimutan ang pride.

Before I said what I really feel, I took a very deep breath. Think for a second and think what are the consequences that I can get in giving it up. At first, I thought they would laugh at me because at the end, ako din yung susuko. Pero naisip ko din, kung hindi ako susuko, walang mangyayari samin. Mawawala lahat. Kaya I told them what I want them to know. I said sorry. Tears are falling from my eyes while I'm typing. I don't know if that tears are because of the hurt that I kept inside. Or it's because I feel so happy that I did what I think is right and I don't have any regrets doing it whether they'll accept it or not. At least, I did my part. 

After I posted it on our group page, I logged out my facebook account. Went home (I'm on the computer cafe that night because our internet connection is acting up) and thinking if there are response on my post. Kinakabahan ako kasi baka iignore lang nila yun. Nakakatakot isipin na pagkatapos ko kainin ang pride ko, hindi padin sila magpapakumbaba. I opened it again after an hour. Sumaya ko sa nakita ko. Naging okay kami. Kelangan lang pala, isang magpapaintindi, at isang marunogn umintindi. Isang magpapatawad, at isang hihingi ng tawad. 

After that, I felt relieved. Lahat ng galit, nawala. The day after, parang wala lang. Dating gawi pero mapapansin mo na medyo awkward. Pero at least okay na. And I'm thankful for that. Second chances are sometimes good. They can open a new chapter. A new life. A new memories. 

So, hoping for another year of friendship, laughs, tweeter-pating moments and dramas. Cheers to teenage life! 

TB

Remember the last thing that I blogged here is about my COLLEGE FRIENDS. It's been a month exactly today. WOW. Coincidence. That was September 19 and now is October 19. Keewl. I said in that blog post that I will post our kabaliwan soon. Our photos that we took almost everyday, our stories, jokes, and everything that we talk about everyday, every minute. Well, I don't think I will do it anymore. I don't know.. biglang nawala lahat ng pinagkaingatan ko. Yung isang araw, magugulat ka nalang, everyone hates you. They post they anger towards you. Pinaparinggan ka na, nilalait ka pa. Masakit. I'm hurt. So much hurt. I was crying last night because I can't help it. I ate a lot of sweets just to feel comforted. I was praying last night and thinking what I did wrong to them, why they suddenly hate me. Ang alam kong ginawa ko, is di ako sumama sa outing namin. Because of 3 reasons. First, sobrang daming gagawin at di kaya ng Monday. Second, wala pa kong pera. I have money, but not enough. And lastly, dahil sa nangyari. Supposedly, susunod ako kinabukasan. Pero dahil sa nangyari, I changed my mind. Di maganda pag sumunod pa ko. Awkward. Kasi alam ko, pinaguusapan na nila ko dun. Masakit isipin na ganun ang nangyayari. Okay naman talaga kami eh. The last thing I remember, we're laughing and throwing jokes at each other and then they don't talk to me suddenly. Di ko alam ano nagawa kong sobrang big deal sakanila. I thought they can handle me at my worst dahil we're friends since we're at our first years. Simula nun, lagi na kaming magkakasama sa lahat ng bagay. Tapos, everything will fall apart ng biglaan. Di ko na alam... Naalala ko si _______. Siya ng pinaka-una kong friend sa college. I can still remember our first encounter. The place, her face, and even our first conversation. HAHA! Pero ngayon, parang mawawala na lahat. Dahil lang sa di pagkakaintindihan. Pati si ________. Kahit nakakabwiset siya at all times, kahit may pagkamasama ugali niya, kahit she's too loud, kahit laitera siya... I accept her as my friend. I accepted her flaws. THEIR flaws, either. Friend ko padin naman sila eh. Di naman ako nagtatanim ng sama ng loob. I'm not that type of person. Magagalit ako pero just a short period of time. Masakit lang talaga sa ngayon. Nalulungkot ako. Kanina, I was crying again. But kasama ko si ____. Alam kong she'll understand me. Nafeel na niya nafefeel ko eh. Umiiyak lang ako habang nagkkwento. Siya naman, nakikinig lang. Walang angal. I feel comforted pag ganun. May makinig at makaunawa lang sakin, okay na ko. At least alam kong kahit papano, someone can understand me. Yung hindi sila pumapanig sa isang side lang. Ganun din si _______. Naiintindihan niya ko. Okay na yun. Andyan din naman si _______ at si _________. Di sila nakikisali. Instead, pinagbabati pa kami. Pero I don't think maayos pa 'to. I know them well. Their attitudes. Their PRIDES. Haaay. I'm crying again. I feel so down and depressed. Tapos stressed pa. Buti nalang we will have a party on sunday with my highschool friends. I feel relieved. After nun, iisipin ko nanaman kung pano ko sila haharapin sa school. Even ________, ________, ________, ________ and ________. I know they hate me. Naiinis sila sakin. Sabe. Buti nalang sembreak na. Medyo lalamig ang sitwasyon at maiiwasan ko din sila. I can think clearly. Naiisip ko nga, lipat kaya kong school? Kaso, sayang naman lahat ng pinaghirapan ko dun. Pati na din yung ibang friends na maiiwan ko dun. I feel so helpless right now. I can still manage to smile, but my one friend knows i'm not that happy. Alam niyang fake lahat ng smileys na nirereply ko sakanya. Nawalan din ako ng appetite. Iba talaga pag friends ang nawala. Mas masaklap kesa sa mawalan ka ng boyfriend. Mas madaming luhang mawawala. Mas madaming time na malungkot ka. Well, ano pa nga ba magagawa ko? The damage has been done. Sana lang wag na lumaki pa. I love my friends so much. Kumabaga, sila ang comforter ko. Pag stressed ako sa bahay, isipin ko lang na makikita at makakakwentuhan ko sila bukas, stress free na ko. Naalala ko yung movie na "The Reunion". Ayun ang first movie na pinanuod namin together as friends. And that is a story of friendship. Nagkagulo man sila, but at the end of the day, they remain as friends. Sana ganun kami. Isang SORRY lang naman gusto ko eh. I know demanding ako at mahirap ang hinihingi ko. Pero kung ayun ang makakapag-ayos ng lahat, why not give a one? Diba? I'm willing to say sorry naman eh. I know nagmaldita ko. And don't have any regrets. Sana maging okay na. Sana makalimot na ang lahat. Sana wala ng gulo. Sana katulad padin kami ng dati. Yung masaya, puro tawa, walang iwanan, puro gaguhan, kainan, kwentuhan, murahan, laitan, kiligan. Haaaaay. :( I don't think mababasa nila 'to. And I know ayaw nila sa madrama at napakahabang babasahin. Mga tamad kaya yung mg yun. HAHA! Maybe _____ will read this. Pero I don't think na nabibisita pa siya dito. More tumblr siya/sila eh. So, Dear whoever reading this, please tell my friends what i'm afraid to say. I love them to bits. I'm sorry if I acted like a mess. If I annoyed them and pushed them to limits. I didn't meant to ruined our friendships. They're my sisters and brothers. My comforters. My happy pill. My human diary. My mirror. My BESTFRIENDS. I will miss you, guise, balatubas, ulupong, girlfriends, my TROPANG BIGATIN. ♥ *sobs*

You can count on me like 123, I'll be there

And I know when I needed

I can count on you like 432, you'll be there

Cause that's what friends are supposed to do, oh yeaaah. 

Pricetag

They always say, "Money can't buy happiness". Well for me, it can. I do believe that money can buy my happiness. 

Money pays my internet connection which is the same thing. It can buy the foods I eat. The clothes i'm wearing, the stuffs i'm using, and money pays my school which is my biggest happiness. Yes, I get lazy and tired when going to school but not at all times. But whenever I think that I'm studying at a good school, it makes me happy. Because not all people are getting that kind of opportunity because of one fucking problem. Money. See? People who didn't able to finish their school feels so sad and incomplete. I know the love of my Family and friends and all the people around me is the greatest happiness that books and movies are saying. But in reality, it's not. I want to buy all the things that my parents can't provide me. I want to go to Paris and travel the world. I want my future family to have a good life. I want to be successful after 4yrs. And how can I achieve that? I should finish my studies first. And how can I finish my studies? Of course to study hard and have money to pay my school. I'm not that smart type of person who easily get scholarship so I don't waste my time getting exams to get scholarship.

So, if you're going to ask me if i'm happy with my life now. I would probably say, I'm not happy. Oh, wait. I laugh hard, then i'm happy. Let me rephrase it. I'm not contented with what I have now. My life sucks. Yeah.  

Summer 2012 (Part II)

Hey! Are you nuts? Hahaha! Harvested some nuts for the outing.

Farm girl. Teehee!

Baby sitter. -_- :))

Hey, mom! Why mad? =))

Hahahaha! This is so embarrassing. Don't ask why. :|

Briiiiidge.

8 ft.

Spongebob and Squidward without a nose. Lol.

Ride with me? Haha.

With my 2 boys. Superman & Batman. ♥

The "It's-not-slippery-even-though-it's-wet" Slide.  :))

LOL! My face.

This is the Part 2 of our Summer escapade this year. We're at Big Rock Farm & Resort at Bulacan. Just like the Part 1, I posted too much photos here because that explains how fun here. Haha! This place is cool as you can see. There are so many structures and pools here. But I like the cave-pool more cause it sheds me from the heat of the sun. As you can see, there are photos of us in a farm is because early morning, the same day, we went to our ancestor's house and to my lola's Farm first to harvest some nuts that we planted 4 months ago. I think? And it's near to the resort that's why it's okay for us to stay there in a while. Well, it's fun. I feel like i'm a kid again. :)