Bibitaw na ko. Hindi naman ako masaya eh. Hindi siya yung gusto ko. Wala siya sa mga standards ko. Hindi ako worth for him. Hindi ko kayang suklian mga pinapakita niya.Hindi ako ang para sakanya. Hanggang "Bestfriends" lang ang kaya kong i-afford. Nag-expect siya ng more than that dahil sa pinakita ko. Akala niya the feeling is mutual. It's my fault. Sana bumalik na kami sa dati. Sasaktan ko lang siya pag tinuloy pa 'to. Wala talaga eh. At the end of the day, hindi siya yung nasa isip ko. It's not him I want to end up with. SORRY BUT NOT SORRY.
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Wednesday, July 03, 2013
Friday, June 28, 2013
062813
After 3 years of being stuck to my pathetic EX boyfriend who broke my heart, I can feel that "kilig feeling" again. He fetched me to school (of course there's that meet and greet with my friends and he's shy daw asar!) and accompanied me to home. We rode on a bus, talking, laughing for one hour (he even said "sana traffic" ugh), walked from the tricycle station up to my house. I let him go inside our small house because there's no one inside, but my cousin saw him that made me introduced him to him. We stayed there for whom 20 minutes, make him eat, drink and rest for a while. We had our "kulitan moments" until I let him go home. By then, i'm the one who accompany him to the bus stop. We walked again for minutes while having our kulitan. When we are waiting, he placed his arms on my side and I placed mine on his shoulders. And when the bus came, we said our goodbyes to each other and guess what? He kissed me, but just on the hair!! But it's... :">
Thursday, June 27, 2013
UGH
Where will I start? Uhm.. okay. here it goes. Si ano kase, he has that "something" for me. And then he's, you know sweet, but it's unusual for me because we like to brawl with each other. And then.... Putangina, may nanliligaw sakin pero ewan ko kung matutuwa ba ko or what!!! Feeling ko ang unfair ko sakanya pag pinagpatuloy ko pa 'to! Puta, second chance na 'to! Hindi kami natuloy nung 4th yr ako dahil sa hayup na D na yan dahil di ako maka-move on sakanya! Pero he's still here kahit na nagka-girlfriend na siya na batchmate din namin. That's why I feel like I am being unfair to him dahil naman sa punyetang G na 'to na kahit minsan di man lang ako napansin at wala atang balak pansinin ako!! Yung hindi man lang niya alam kung gano ko siya kagusto at mahigit isang taon ko na siya hinihiling kay Lord at pinagbubuhusan ng efforts!!!! Deputa! Eto paaa... Feeling ko he's just bored or I was his option slash second choice slash rebound girl dahil niloko siya nung ex niya!! Langya!! Pero I know him, at alam ko kung sincere siya or hindi. Hindi pa kami pero nagakakaganto na ko, pano pa kaya if ever sagutin ko siya, baka mas mabilis pa sa wedding ni Kim Kardashian at Kris Humphries yung relationship namin dahil sa kagagahan ko! Sayang effort niya sakin if I'll stay like this. I'm not worth his time and effort and everything. Isa pa... yung sasabihin ng iba! Ang hirap pag maliit lang yung mundong ginagalawan niyo, not literally. Pero yung group of friends niyo. Although may bagong bf na yung ex niya na niloko siya, I'm still sure that there's still a part of her na ayaw niya maging masaya yung ex niya at magpapaka-selfish muna siya. So, in the end, magagalit siya sakin at pag-uusapan ng mga friends niyang walang ginawa kundi mag-pacute at mag-babytalk kasama na din yung boyfriend niyang tropa ng ex niya! Leche. Nakakaloko! Haaaaaaayyyy! What should I do?! Hiniling ko 'to eh! But not complicated like this! Smh.
Monday, April 08, 2013
D.
Okaaaay. Will have a short blog dedicated to HIM. I shouldn't talking about him anymore, but I can't help it. Well, he's been a part of my life BEFORE, so no big deal.
If you read my blogpost "second <\3," he's my first heartbreak that I'm talking about. Let's call him D. I will not mention his full name for some safety. Hehe. But if you're my highschool friend, cousin, or VERY close friend, you already know who I'm talking about when I say D.
I have a lot of flings when I was in highschool. Yes. Flings, MUs, etc. Landi lang, diba? Lol. Pero good thing about it, I never have any commitments to anyone of them. We became close friends, actually. And never akong gumawa ng first move para landiin nila ko. Aminin man natin o hinde, masaya yung ganun. Puro flings lang. Pero syempre, may konting part sayo na aasa ka na sana mag-work out kahit walang commitment. That's what highschool is all about.
I met D when I was in my Junior year. He's my bestie's crush. Pinakilala niya sakin and I found out na classmate siya ng cousin ko. Ironic, isn't it? Edi we became friends. Malaking tulong din na classmate siya ng pinsan ko kasi, tuwing may lakwatsa or whatsoever, lagi ko lang excuse na kasama ko siya. D introduced me to his friends. 4 boys (which is one of the best group of boys that I love and I'l never forget haha) and 4 girls including my cousin. And did you know that 3 of the boys are also my flings before. Hahaha. Except 1 because my gf siya that time which is tropa din nila. Ewan ko bakit lakas ko maka-magnet ng boylets, eh di naman ako chix nun. Haha. So, ayun. We all became close at naging tropa na din nila ko. Lagi kaming tambay sa pacheco (only hccsians know that place mehehe) pag uwian at pag walang lakad ang pokers. Ang unang ka-fling ko nun sa tropa niya ay si *tooot* hahahaha. He courted me pero di ko siya sinagot and you know? I regret that day nung narealize kong ok pala siya. Haaay, regrets. Ok. Next is *tooooot* naging ka-MU ko siya. Kala ko nga dadating kami sa part na magkakaron na ng "something" pero biglang ewan. Lumabo bigla. Tas si *toooot* tinanong lang niya ko kung may chance, eh ex siya ng pinsan ko kaya a big NO NO. Ok pa naman sana siya, sayang. Hahaha. Kung sobrang landi ko lang edi pinatos ko na yun. Lol. And then D enters my fairytale. Sa kanilang lahat, sakanya ko nakita yung "spark" haha so highschool. We have an endearment, Honeybunch. Hahahahahaha! Lagi kaming nasa kanila pag shortened period. Inuman, you know? Haha. Alam naming may something saming dalawa at alam naming nararamdaman yun ng tropa kaya inaasar nila kami at kinukulit kung kami na daw ba. That time, we act like bf-gf pero hindi kami. May gf siya pero hinahatid niya ko samin. Hindi namin tinataksil ang gf niya. We're bestfriends that time. Pag may problema sila, sakin niya unang sinasabi. Until we found out na tina-timer siya nung girl sa 2 yrs nitong bf. Awww. Ang tanga niya pa nun kasi ayaw niyang maniwala until siya na mismo ang nakakita. I'm his comfort zone that time. His shoulders to lean on. Sobrang close na namin. Sobrang sweet niya pa. We had our first date February 2010 with the pokers, pero di pa kami nun. Naging kami a day before my JS prom when he asked me if we can make the things official. Nakaramdam din siguro. Hahaha! Dahil sobrang tagal na namin naglalandian, di ko na pinatagal pa. Oo, wala pang isang araw o isang oras niya kong niligawan. Ba't ba? Haha. We became official Feb. 20 Pinakilala niya din pala ko sa family niya nung birthday niya, Jan 19, so di pa kami nun. Kakabreak lang nila. So, it means... isa kong dakilang REBOUND girlfriend. Ouch. Pero di ko naisip yun that time kase alam kong nafall na kami parehas although mapapansin mong may part pa sakanya na nasasaktan padin siya. He even asked me to have sex on him. Like, wth do you think I am? Am I that easy-to-get-highschooler Bitch? Kahit na sabihin kong mahal ko siya, di padin ako papayag. Respeto! Ganun lang gusto ko. Pero, hindi siya manyak na tao. Ewan ko kung bakit pumasok sa isip niya yung mga bagay na yun. Syempre di ako pumayag. Kadiri kaya! Tsaka 15 lang ako nun noh. Ayoko nga maging teenage parent. Madami pa kong pangarap sa buhay. Yung magkaanak, nasa huli pa yan. Ulul siya sa part na yun. Wrong move siya. HAHA. We lasted for 3 mos only. Hindi rin nag-work out diba? Biglaan kase. We broke up for unknown reason, after kasi nung gabing yun, di na kami ulit nagusap. Nasayang lahat. Ayun yung masakit na part. Pero ganun daw talaga. Highschool life, eh? Just be happy na naramdaman ko yun kahit papano.
After nun, 4thyr na ko. Medyo naka-move on na lahat. Lalo na siya. After a month, or wala pang 1 month, eh nagka-gf kagad siya. Galing! Haha. Another rebound girl. Haha. Madami na ding nagtry manligaw sakin. Try lang, kasi di rin naman sila uubra. Ewan ko. Simula nung break-up namin, I don't like entertaining admirers anymore. Para di awkward, totropahin ko nalang sila, para cute. Mehehe. Minsan pa nga, tropa ko pa nanliligaw eh. Syempre, I'll say to them straight to the point na magttotropa kami at walang talo-talo. Hehe. Nagpatuloy din manligaw si *tooooot* sakin. Tropa ni D. One of his bestfriend. Yeah. Kaya di ko siya sinagot. Gusto ko sana kaso, ang pangit talagang tignan at pakinggan. So, we remain as close friends at I helped him to find a girfriend. I'm such a dork. Haha. Simula nung break-up, feeling ko naging man-hater na ko. Pero hindi. Sa dami ng boylets ko, man-hater pa ko ng lagay na yun? Hahaha. Ayoko lang ng relationshits. Siguro, di pa ngayon. Gusto ko na pero di pa ko ready. Kaya tinutuon ko yung oras ko sa lalaking wala namang paki. Pero at least napapansin niya ko. Hihi.
Kung bakit wala pa kong boyfriend hanggang ngayon, ayun ay dahil kay D. Pero hindi dahil may feelings pa ko sakanya. Pero dahil tumaas ang standards ko sa mga boys at natuto na ko mag-ingat. But I'm happy that he's happy now. I think she finally found a long-lasting relationship with his highschool classmate. Siya na pinakamatagal na gf ni D. Just like what he always telling me before that he got on Enrile's tv campaign, "Gusto ko, happy ka!" And yes, hopefully, I will be. :) B.
If you read my blogpost "second <\3," he's my first heartbreak that I'm talking about. Let's call him D. I will not mention his full name for some safety. Hehe. But if you're my highschool friend, cousin, or VERY close friend, you already know who I'm talking about when I say D.
I have a lot of flings when I was in highschool. Yes. Flings, MUs, etc. Landi lang, diba? Lol. Pero good thing about it, I never have any commitments to anyone of them. We became close friends, actually. And never akong gumawa ng first move para landiin nila ko. Aminin man natin o hinde, masaya yung ganun. Puro flings lang. Pero syempre, may konting part sayo na aasa ka na sana mag-work out kahit walang commitment. That's what highschool is all about.
I met D when I was in my Junior year. He's my bestie's crush. Pinakilala niya sakin and I found out na classmate siya ng cousin ko. Ironic, isn't it? Edi we became friends. Malaking tulong din na classmate siya ng pinsan ko kasi, tuwing may lakwatsa or whatsoever, lagi ko lang excuse na kasama ko siya. D introduced me to his friends. 4 boys (which is one of the best group of boys that I love and I'l never forget haha) and 4 girls including my cousin. And did you know that 3 of the boys are also my flings before. Hahaha. Except 1 because my gf siya that time which is tropa din nila. Ewan ko bakit lakas ko maka-magnet ng boylets, eh di naman ako chix nun. Haha. So, ayun. We all became close at naging tropa na din nila ko. Lagi kaming tambay sa pacheco (only hccsians know that place mehehe) pag uwian at pag walang lakad ang pokers. Ang unang ka-fling ko nun sa tropa niya ay si *tooot* hahahaha. He courted me pero di ko siya sinagot and you know? I regret that day nung narealize kong ok pala siya. Haaay, regrets. Ok. Next is *tooooot* naging ka-MU ko siya. Kala ko nga dadating kami sa part na magkakaron na ng "something" pero biglang ewan. Lumabo bigla. Tas si *toooot* tinanong lang niya ko kung may chance, eh ex siya ng pinsan ko kaya a big NO NO. Ok pa naman sana siya, sayang. Hahaha. Kung sobrang landi ko lang edi pinatos ko na yun. Lol. And then D enters my fairytale. Sa kanilang lahat, sakanya ko nakita yung "spark" haha so highschool. We have an endearment, Honeybunch. Hahahahahaha! Lagi kaming nasa kanila pag shortened period. Inuman, you know? Haha. Alam naming may something saming dalawa at alam naming nararamdaman yun ng tropa kaya inaasar nila kami at kinukulit kung kami na daw ba. That time, we act like bf-gf pero hindi kami. May gf siya pero hinahatid niya ko samin. Hindi namin tinataksil ang gf niya. We're bestfriends that time. Pag may problema sila, sakin niya unang sinasabi. Until we found out na tina-timer siya nung girl sa 2 yrs nitong bf. Awww. Ang tanga niya pa nun kasi ayaw niyang maniwala until siya na mismo ang nakakita. I'm his comfort zone that time. His shoulders to lean on. Sobrang close na namin. Sobrang sweet niya pa. We had our first date February 2010 with the pokers, pero di pa kami nun. Naging kami a day before my JS prom when he asked me if we can make the things official. Nakaramdam din siguro. Hahaha! Dahil sobrang tagal na namin naglalandian, di ko na pinatagal pa. Oo, wala pang isang araw o isang oras niya kong niligawan. Ba't ba? Haha. We became official Feb. 20 Pinakilala niya din pala ko sa family niya nung birthday niya, Jan 19, so di pa kami nun. Kakabreak lang nila. So, it means... isa kong dakilang REBOUND girlfriend. Ouch. Pero di ko naisip yun that time kase alam kong nafall na kami parehas although mapapansin mong may part pa sakanya na nasasaktan padin siya. He even asked me to have sex on him. Like, wth do you think I am? Am I that easy-to-get-highschooler Bitch? Kahit na sabihin kong mahal ko siya, di padin ako papayag. Respeto! Ganun lang gusto ko. Pero, hindi siya manyak na tao. Ewan ko kung bakit pumasok sa isip niya yung mga bagay na yun. Syempre di ako pumayag. Kadiri kaya! Tsaka 15 lang ako nun noh. Ayoko nga maging teenage parent. Madami pa kong pangarap sa buhay. Yung magkaanak, nasa huli pa yan. Ulul siya sa part na yun. Wrong move siya. HAHA. We lasted for 3 mos only. Hindi rin nag-work out diba? Biglaan kase. We broke up for unknown reason, after kasi nung gabing yun, di na kami ulit nagusap. Nasayang lahat. Ayun yung masakit na part. Pero ganun daw talaga. Highschool life, eh? Just be happy na naramdaman ko yun kahit papano.
After nun, 4thyr na ko. Medyo naka-move on na lahat. Lalo na siya. After a month, or wala pang 1 month, eh nagka-gf kagad siya. Galing! Haha. Another rebound girl. Haha. Madami na ding nagtry manligaw sakin. Try lang, kasi di rin naman sila uubra. Ewan ko. Simula nung break-up namin, I don't like entertaining admirers anymore. Para di awkward, totropahin ko nalang sila, para cute. Mehehe. Minsan pa nga, tropa ko pa nanliligaw eh. Syempre, I'll say to them straight to the point na magttotropa kami at walang talo-talo. Hehe. Nagpatuloy din manligaw si *tooooot* sakin. Tropa ni D. One of his bestfriend. Yeah. Kaya di ko siya sinagot. Gusto ko sana kaso, ang pangit talagang tignan at pakinggan. So, we remain as close friends at I helped him to find a girfriend. I'm such a dork. Haha. Simula nung break-up, feeling ko naging man-hater na ko. Pero hindi. Sa dami ng boylets ko, man-hater pa ko ng lagay na yun? Hahaha. Ayoko lang ng relationshits. Siguro, di pa ngayon. Gusto ko na pero di pa ko ready. Kaya tinutuon ko yung oras ko sa lalaking wala namang paki. Pero at least napapansin niya ko. Hihi.
Kung bakit wala pa kong boyfriend hanggang ngayon, ayun ay dahil kay D. Pero hindi dahil may feelings pa ko sakanya. Pero dahil tumaas ang standards ko sa mga boys at natuto na ko mag-ingat. But I'm happy that he's happy now. I think she finally found a long-lasting relationship with his highschool classmate. Siya na pinakamatagal na gf ni D. Just like what he always telling me before that he got on Enrile's tv campaign, "Gusto ko, happy ka!" And yes, hopefully, I will be. :) B.
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